Looking back at life, most people will be able to identify definitive (often pivotal) moments that changed their life. Some were positive moments, while inevitably, some were negative moments, but with a positive impact over time.
In this brief post, I will share four of the most profound lessons I learned in my adult life. They shaped me, they formed me, and they challenged me. The four lessons all come from mentors. Interestingly these are people whom I have never met. I have listened to them but mostly read their books. It makes me think about another lesson I learned: “You will be the same person from five years now, except for the people you meet and the books you read”. Or, stated differently: “Leaders are readers”.
The first lesson: “If you change, everything will change for you”. These words of wisdom came to me when I was fresh out of Business School—full of dreams and ambition, ready to change the world but with a business on the verge of failure. It just did not make sense: how can I fail? On that day, when I heard those words, I realised that change needed to come from within. I could not change the world, only myself. And on that day I started my journey of focussing on what I can change. I read philosophy, psychology, neuroscience, leadership, biographies of both failures and successes, and much more. And over the years, it prepared me for the next lesson.
The second lesson: “Work harder on yourself than on your job”. It emphasized that one needs balance. One needs to make sure that as an employee/employer, I needed not only to be excellent at my job, but also excellent at myself. This insight paved the way for my continued journey of reading and engaging with people and learning from them.
The third lesson: “Luck is something you attract by the person you become”. This was further validation of the above lessons. We are seldom lucky. One can rarely attribute success to only luck. I learned that by developing my own skills and talents, I was becoming more “attractive” to the world out there. When the opportunity came knocking at my door, and the door opened, it saw a much more attractive prospect which invariably led to success.
The fourth lesson: “First education, then philosophy, then attitude”. All the above came together in this fourth lesson I learned. Success always starts with education. Not just formal education, but self-education too. We must start there. For, only if we learn and explore, can we formalize our own philosophy about life, work, relationships, success, etc. Once we have crafted our own life philosophy, we culture a unique attitude to life. In my case, an attitude of gratitude and positive expectation. If you mix these around, starting with attitude, you land up with an idiot with an attitude.
Enjoy the journey!
Article written by Dr Tienie Stander